Honey, these arms that once held you are ready to fight
He deflates, and she wants so badly to go to him, to apologize for this getting so out of hand when she'd only intended to comfort him when he'd told her about what transpired between him and Remi and Ronin. But she can't. Hotaru is far too prideful, too anxious about her place in this house, in this relationship, to feel like she can reach across the chasm to find him where he stands. Her hand retreats, crossing under her breasts where she can hug herself where he can't see, the cross of her arms foreboding and distracting. As he speaks she sighs softly, because she does understand. "I know...I do. But I fear losing you just as much, and neither of us is going to be able to stop feeling that way." Which speaks volumes for how deeply they care for one another, but does nothing to facilitate understanding or reconciliation.
The mention of Deimos stirs her heart where it aches inside her chest. She longs for her best friend's presence at her side, his stalwart figure and gruff words. Hotaru hadn't even been there when the news of Kiada's death had reached him, already lost to her own sickness, and though it had not been within her control she feels that failure keenly. Part of her is more than happy to take the chance to leave. To return to Halo, with its icy reaches and memories of home. The other part curls away like a wounded creature, pain humming across her nerves in a way he will not be able to read from her. Because they don't have that ability, not like he and Nate do. And she is far too glacial and perfect sometimes to be so easily perceived. "And Nate? Will you send him away too?" Or are you just trying to get rid of me?
Except then he continues on, and her breath hitches automatically at hearing Kiada's name on his lips, and any hope of understanding what he says disintegrates into dust. "What?" she croaks, hands falling away from her belly as she steps further away from him, the radiating cold of the glass behind her telling her there's nowhere further to go. Mismatched eyes search his for any sign of dishonesty. She doesn't believe him capable of such cruelty, but the truth is just as impossible to swallow. "She's alive?" Each word trembles with the sudden onslaught of emotion, tears clogging her throat as she blinks heavily to keep them from building in her eyes. Ascended, yes, which presents a variety of problems in itself, but alive. Hotaru's hands come up to press the heels of her palms into her eyes hard, shoulders shaking as the darkness of her closed eyes explode into starbursts beneath the pressure, trying to use the discomfort to find some sort of mental clarity. "Where...where is she?" Heart immediately sinking with terror at the notion that she may be with Nate, facing yet another battle she might not return from before Hotaru even sees her again.
The mention of Deimos stirs her heart where it aches inside her chest. She longs for her best friend's presence at her side, his stalwart figure and gruff words. Hotaru hadn't even been there when the news of Kiada's death had reached him, already lost to her own sickness, and though it had not been within her control she feels that failure keenly. Part of her is more than happy to take the chance to leave. To return to Halo, with its icy reaches and memories of home. The other part curls away like a wounded creature, pain humming across her nerves in a way he will not be able to read from her. Because they don't have that ability, not like he and Nate do. And she is far too glacial and perfect sometimes to be so easily perceived. "And Nate? Will you send him away too?" Or are you just trying to get rid of me?
Except then he continues on, and her breath hitches automatically at hearing Kiada's name on his lips, and any hope of understanding what he says disintegrates into dust. "What?" she croaks, hands falling away from her belly as she steps further away from him, the radiating cold of the glass behind her telling her there's nowhere further to go. Mismatched eyes search his for any sign of dishonesty. She doesn't believe him capable of such cruelty, but the truth is just as impossible to swallow. "She's alive?" Each word trembles with the sudden onslaught of emotion, tears clogging her throat as she blinks heavily to keep them from building in her eyes. Ascended, yes, which presents a variety of problems in itself, but alive. Hotaru's hands come up to press the heels of her palms into her eyes hard, shoulders shaking as the darkness of her closed eyes explode into starbursts beneath the pressure, trying to use the discomfort to find some sort of mental clarity. "Where...where is she?" Heart immediately sinking with terror at the notion that she may be with Nate, facing yet another battle she might not return from before Hotaru even sees her again.
HOTARU
