never seen that color blue

As Sam's snapped out a response, Loren flinched a bit. Then he forced his features into a neutral mask. "Sorry. Dumb question." Rubbing a hand on his thigh, he pressed his lips together. "So you are mad." It was a statement, but it came out with a questioning tone. Hesitantly, he reached out and laid a hand on the bookmaker's shoulder. "Look I...told you I didn't want anything serious. And I think I still meant that. But..." Voice trailing off, the healer sighed. "That doesn't excuse me hurting you. So, I am sorry. Truly. And...whether or not we get on, or have or will have a relationship, I can't say." Running his free hand through his hair, he shook his head a bit sadly. "I mean, we get on. Sorry, I'm making a mess of this." Lifting his hand from the other man's shoulder, the Launceleyn rubbed it awkwardly. "I'm shit at relationships. Always have been, probably always will be." Biting his lip, he looked away from Sam. "I like you." The admission came out quietly, and he couldn't meet the bookmaker's eyes. "But I'm just, I'm not ready for what I think you want from me. So I got scared. And when I'm scared, or upset, or depressed I make stupid decisions. Which inevitably just make everything worse." The healer hugged his arms to himself  "I thought you'd be...madder. Hate me, maybe." Taking a deep breath, he forced himself to open his eyes. "But...I had to tell you. Because like I said, I, I like you." LOREN Not quite an open book